Japanese cities to not avoid
I recently watched half of this video on YouTube: Japanese cities to avoid at all costsI perhaps have fallen for the intent of the video which is to be absolutely fucking ridiculous such that people complain that your video is ridiculous in order to gain attention. It may be working in this case. That doesn't make me think the video isn't shit.
I downloaded the subtitles for this shitacular video so that I can rip apart what is said line by line.
I'll start with the opening line: "Millions of Americans are booking Japan right now, and most of them have no idea what they're actually walking into."
I dunno. I think they have a pretty good fucking idea of what they are walking into. An awesome time in Japan because Japan is fucking awesome and your video fucking sucks.
Let's continue.
"Because the Japan in the travel brochures and the Japan on the ground in 2025 are two completely different places."
Does this fuckwit even live in Japan? Pretty sure no. I do. So "the Japan on the ground?" My feet are on the ground, in Japan, right now. Now, I don't really know what the damned travel brochures are saying, but if it is anything like "Japan is kickass go travel there it will be awesome" then I think it's pretty accurate.
"Today, we ranked all 15 from the cities that look magical in photos, but fall apart the moment you arrive..."
I was bracing already for piles of bullshit slander against 15 Japanese cities.
1. Tokyo
I'm going to summarize OP's randomly crap-attack because frankly it is boring.
Here is the essentially critique of Tokyo:
- Tokyo isn't actually safe overall due to dangers
- Reality has shifted; it isn't safe
- Fodors placed Tokyo on it's 2025 "no list"
- Gap between expectation and experience is alaraming
- Tourism pollution is wild
- Prices are up 25% since 6 years ago
- Tourists pay whatever the market demands
- Locals can't find affordable places to stay
- There are dangerous scams
- Roppongi and Kabukicho are organized traps
- All you can drink scams
- Bars are drugging people to steal their money
- Dangerous heat in Tokyo
This is all just fucking ridiculous. It says the main reason Tokyo is somewhere you should avoid Tokyo is because there are all you can drink scams.
What... in... the... actual... fuck.
OR you fucking dumbass, just avoid the fucking drink scams. Damn. WOw. Crazy I know. Tourists are incapable of this. Avoid TOKYO! Because... in a shady bit of Tokyo, if you are a fucking dumbass and go along with random scammy strangers, you could get tricked in the process of intentionally drinking yourself into a stupor.
Gee. It's hard for me to summon much sympathy here.
The video further claims bars are drugging tourists. Like ok that's bad. But that is an actual crime and you CAN report that to police and they WILL hold the places accountable, because guess what, if you have aactually been drugged they can detect it in your blood and then do something about that.
Also, like that isn't a fucking dangerous at ANY shady dive bar in the world? Okay okay getting drugged by the bar itself is fairly unusual compared to being drugged by a stranger, but still...
Let's move away from the "getting conned while being an alcoholic" nonsense, because I frankly don't care, and you, as a tourist, shouldn't care either.
Just don't do that. &tm;
Tokyo Isn't safe
The fuck it isn't. It's crazy safe. Nothing said in the video demonstrates otherwise. Overall it is safe as fuck. Compared to say, Baltimore, New York, or LA, it is fucking safety paradise.
Tourism Pollution
Sure. Fair. FOR the most congested popular places to go. Just go elsewhere. Tokyo is fucking gigantic and has a shit ton of places to go and do things.
Also, "there are a lot of people and there are queues" is not really a reason to avoid going to popular tourist attractions. Tourist attractions are like this every single place that is a "tourist attraction" on the damned planet. This is a stupid reason to avoid a place.
It's valid to avoid "tourist traps" if what you want is peace and scenery. I grant you that. So just do that then if that's your issue.
Roppongi and Kabukicho are dangerous
As far as Japan goes, sure they are more dangerous than other places. Still DAMNED SAFE.
Dangerous heat
Yarr, if you don't fucking drink any water dipshit. Get a sun umbrella, dress appropriately, and drink water. Tada problem solved.
Prices are up
They are complaining that prices are up 25% from prices 6 years ago? Tf. Where is this not the case on planet? Stupid.
Also, Japan is fucking crazy cheap compared to vacations anywhere on the US. A 2 week vacation in Japan with travel to there from the US is going to cost you far less than a 2 week vacation almost anywhere in the US.
So 25% more expensive? OMG panic! It's still cheap omg I can't handle it!! It's not dirt cheap any more, it's only sand cheap now!! Raaa!!!
Expectation vs Reality is Alarming
What expectation? That you can safely drink yourself into a coma at a dive bar after following a stranger? Tf?
Tokyo Summary
I don't even like Tokyo personally. Tokyo is too busy and chaotic for me. I like the calm country of Japan. But that doesn't mean Tokyo doesn't have awesome stuff if your goal is to see awesome stuff in a short amount of time like when you are vacation.
Sure you'll get burned out. Probably. What the heck did you think was going to happen when you go to one of the largest cities on earth that is jammed packed with absurd numbers of people. Durr.
14. Fuji-Kawaguchiko
I've been all around places over by Fuji. Before I begin railing on this I need to double check that I comprehend which area I'm actually talking about. One moment.
Ok back. Yeah I'm remembering correctly. The lake in Kawaguchiko is the one I am thinking of. The place is awesome. It's relaxing. There are piles of neat small museums in the area.
I have no idea what they are bitching about in the video really. There is no problem there.
Sure sure some dipshits are causing trouble by a random convenience store. Who gives a shit.
Also tourists are not throwing out their trash properly I guess. And, so? Like yeah that's a problem I guess for the locals and you shouldn't do that, but how exactly does that affect travelling there on vacation in any way.
I don't get it.
I especially think the Karaguchiko Music Forest is neat. There is also Fuji-Q highlands nearby, which is an awesome theme park.
Maybe these numbnuts went there during a weekend adjacent to a Japanese holiday? Who knows...
The video shows cherry blossoms in bloom in it around the lake. If that is what they are judging by, well no shit, every single fucking beautiful place with cherry blossoms in Japan anywhere in Japan basically is mobbed with people at peak bloom. That's just, like, the experience. The same shit occurs in Washington DC too.
If you don't want that, find a hidden grove of the trees somewhere in the country. There are nice plum blossoms on Mt Tsukuba for example that aren't terribly busy even when in full bloom.
If you go to a place famous for being awesome in travel brochures during a special season or holiday you have zero right to bitch that it was crowded.
There is further critique in the video that tourists aren't going to the hot springs, hiking trails, and so on in Karaguchiko. Uhh. The video has just pointed out that the problem is nothing to do with Kawaguchiko being a problem place to go, it's just somewhere you should do the awesome things there instead of stupid shit like harassing a Lawson's or climbing on top of people's houses.
13. Hakone
Hakone is crazy popular with people in Tokyo and anywhere in Japan where you can get there by train within an hour or two. This is before you consider any tourism from outside the country.
Because Hakone is an awesome tourist trap in beautiful country. You are trapped in a place where there is a ton of cool stuff. OMG terrible.
There are hot springs. Damned hot springs. The horror. Full of naked people! Gosh.
The focus of the fucking video ( TFV ) is that it makes a bad day trip.
Well no shit genius. There is a enough to do there that a week ( or two ) is a perfectly reasonable time to spend in Hakone. Get a hotel. Stay. Relax. Rent a car and drive the kickass places around there where the train hoard isn't at. Awesome.
TFV constantly conflates "ugh miserable if you do what every other traveller taking the train does and try to cram it in a day" with "this place sucks". No. The place doesn't suck. You suck for not explaining how to have an awesome time in Hakone.
"Avoid Hakone because dipshits plan badly". Uh. Ok buddy whatever. It's fine with me if you stay the fuck away from Hakone. More for me.
TFV calls out the ropeway as having queues of people especially during the weekend. No shit. What beautiful ropeway anywhere on planet isn't busy during the weekend.
How about you just go for a week, relax at the hot spring and do hiking on weekends, and do the ropeway and other tourist heavy single places during the week. WoWzers. Genius. I figured out how to enjoy vacation. I must be so brilliant.
12. Kyoto
TFV basically says this:
- Kyoto popular tourist sights are crazy busy
- Tourists are harassing geiko and maiko
- Buses are crammed
- The Golden Pavilion is like a Disney ride
I've been to Kyoto and seen exactly what he is talking about. The popular sights are very busy.
And... so? They are popular. So they are busy. Duh.
The buses are crowded. So? Rent a fucking car damnit. There are tons of lots. Sure you have to pay to park, but also so, it's your vacation and worth it. Renting cars in Japan is easy and cheap. Do it. Then you avoid every single issue TFV rants about on how public transportation is crowded.
Or, get this, just accept that it is busy and allocate the reasonable amount of time needed. Sure it wastes lots of time but that is the tradeoff. If you don't want to waste time, DON'T. Rent a car dipshit.
You are a fucking traveller from another country spending a mini fortune on airfare compared to locals on the buses. You aren't making $8 an hour like they are I hope, so you can fuckiing afford to rent a car and laugh at the poor crammed Japanese masses on the buses. Yeah that's not fair that you get to skip that misery, but hey, you are rich compared to them so make use of your riches.
AI is bitching that I called the locals poor. Too fucking bad AI. It's true. Yeah it's cruel and unfair. That's how the world is.
It's also reiterating my main point is that popular places are busy and duh.
On that point another way to get around besides public transport is renting a bicycle. I did that in Kyoto. It was fun. Nice way to skip the long walks while avoiding car travel if you don't want to be driving in Japan.
One thing I will warn you about though, you may have to bicycle the long way or leave your bicycle a bit away from certain popular destinations. The crowds really can be insane. They are there because those sites are really cool. Yes crowds suck. It's the cost of admission.
11. Nara
I haven't actually been to Nara yet that I recall. I definitely would have remembered deer begging for food from me.
I'll still comment though because TFV is crazy in it's condemnation.
Essentially "Begging deer will harass you if you have any food".
Gee. I have an idea. Don't walk around with any food. Tada. Problem solved.
It also says that groups of school children will bug you to speak English with them. Uhh. I'm going to be the jackass American here and give you an idea.
Tell them to fuck off. In English. They want to learn English and western culture right? :D
Welcome to America culture you little turds.
AI is bitching that my "fuck off" idea is unacceptably nasty and that I could say something PC like "imagine avoiding a place because kids want to learn English."
No dipshit AI. The point of TFV IS actually that these kids ARE harassing tourists. Telling them to fuck off, perhaps with a American gesture of single finger friendliness, IS the solution if they are actually harassing tourists. It's fair. It's legal. The kids and the jackass school teachers leading them will feel shame. And good. As they should.
AI is still mad and bugging me to use a calmer response and just tell them you are busy and don't have time. Good for you HR nanny AI. Not my style.
10. Kamakura
Oh boy. Here we go.
TFV spends a bunch of time talking about a single railroad crossing. I have relatives that live several blocks away from there. I've walked through this specific location a bunch of times as a result when visiting. There were piles of idiots in the way there. This is true.
The result for me? I was annoyed and walked around them. The end. Wow. Such a reason to avoid an entire huge fucking area.
Okay okay, so I've also experienced that train being crammed with people. -shrug- Once again, if crowded trains are a reason for you to avoid a place, RENT A FUCKING CAR THEN YOUR MORON.
Fucking bizarrely TFV does nothing to talk about Enoshima and how awesome it is. I'm sure TFV could have wasted a bunch of time bitching about the long lines to go up the tower there during Golden Week or some shit like that.
Yes, sometimes super busy. Once again, -shrug-
Also, once again, I've done lots of stuff all around Kamakura and just generally had fun.
Oh noes there are idiots at this one specific place there! Uh. Walk around them. It takes like 1 minute to do so.
TFV says that some vendors are giving you the wrong change. Okay. Like my response for harassing children, even MORE SO for harassing shopkeeps. Just get mad and scream at them. Tada. You'll probably get your money back.
Jokes aside and being serious, please do not make a huge scene. You can actually get in trouble for that in Japan. Just tell them the change is wrong. Or... gosh... just deal with it. Or give them exact change. Don't avoid a place because tourist trap shops selling crappy trinkets might cheat you out of 50 cents.
TFV also implies that there is some problem with toilets. I've been there recently. Plenty of toilets. Unsure what they are on about there.
9. Nagoya
I have to admit I easily mix up Nagoya, Nagano, and Niigata in my head. One moment while I match up the place name with my travel memories.
Ok memories are working and verified. The main thing I've done in Nagoya? Visit the Nagoya zoo. Omg the Nagoya zoo is absolutely fucking stupendously awesome.
TFV though rambles on about how shitty Ghibli Park is. Who fucking cares. Don't go there then. Go to the zoo and stfu.
It also spends a bunch of time saying there is nothing good in Nagoya that it's just a big city. The zoo dipshits the zoo. Omg. TFV sucks.
8. Nikkō
I'm going to bitch about a detail here first. TFV doesn't use the proper romaji in the subtitles. It's Nikkō.
Yeah yeah I know, who cares. I care.
Why?
Because Nikkō is fucking awesome that's why, so I go out of my way to use the right damned name for the place.
Also, it isn't just the spelling that bothers me in TFV. It is the constant mispronunciation of place names. I'm especially bothered by "Kyot-oh". It's not "Kyot-oh" you horrible tourist! It's "kyo-to"! Fucking say it correctly damn it.
It just immediately makes me distrust everything they have to say when they clearly haven't spent enough time in Japan to be able to say the most popular large place names in it with the proper pronunciation. It's disrespectful.
Moving on though to their complaint.
TFV complains that the 3 monkey carving shrine place is sometimes busy. Yarr. I've experienced this. It was annoying that it was busy one of the many times I went there. The rest of the times still busy too, just not as busy.
It's just, like, shrug, irrelevant. Sometimes a popular tourist place is busy. Sometimes it ain't. Go there during the week and not on holiday. Tada not busy.
It also mentions "tourists buy minimal souvenirs". Tf. Is this a video telling us to avoid problem places, or trying to harass tourists into buying trinkets? I don't get it.
Yeah I'm a cheapskate. Tough shit video author. Also I live in Japan, and I do what the locals do, which is go places to enjoy them not to buy worthless trinkets. Okay okay the locals buy random junk too. Buy the snacks then. Better than the random mass produced magnets and other junk. The food is tasty. Yum.
TFV also blabbers about thin pathways. Yeah, and? So? Big whoop. Be patient and people keep walking.
It's like the shitheads who made TFV went to one shrine in Nikkō and judged the whole place. I've been to Nikkō I think 8 times now, and it has been awesome every single fucking time, except perhaps I was annoyed the one time I used the train instead of driving, because the bus schedules in Nikkō suck because it's out in the country.
Rent a car. Tada. Nikkō become awesome is.
There are so so so many cool places to see in Nikkō. Beautiful country. Beautiful sites. Hiking. Etc etc.
Whining about a few popular places being a little crowded is stupid.
7. Osaka
I stopped watching TFV before this one. The Nikkō bullshit annoyed me too much. I'll have to go by the subtitles because I can't be bothered to cringe through the actual video. One moment.
TFV:
- Osaka castle is a reconstruction omg oh no. Nobody cares duders.
- There are counterfeit goods omg omg. Once again...
- It's crowded! Ugh. This is getting boring. It's a big city. Some places have tourists. Next...
- Going there in peak means wall to wall crowds. Yep yep and water is wet. Next...
- Therefore don't go to Osaka. Uh... TF? Big leap any?
6. Okinawa
Lulz lulz. I haven't even read the subtitles and I can imagine the complaints already. I think I could actually construct some decent complaints.
I'm imagining TFV saying "In monsoon season it rained constantly!" I went there once during the rainy weeks and it rained heavily the entire time. That wasn't optimal and I saw less beautiful plants. Maybe don't go there when it is raining constantly.
On to what TFV says. One moment while I read it.
TFV:
- Dangerous things in the water. Uhh. It's an ocean with ocean life. Whatever... next...
- Typhoon. And there it is. Water water water. Yeah. -shrug- Big whoop. Was there during one.
It then proceeds to say shit-all about all the absolutely incredible awesome things in Okinawa.
Good job dumbasses, you said nothing really at all about Okinawa besides "Don't get stung by a jellyish or go there during rainy season." Good tips, but you presented zero evidence that you should avoid Okinawa.
TFV Places to Go
TFV now moves to their "top five places to go in Japan."
Now, in a normal "top places in Japan" review I'd expect reasoning on why the place is better than the other places.
With TFV my expectation is that the author is going to reccomend places basically nobody goes to on their first Japan trip. Essentially they just turn a regular "Japan tourism" list upside down.
Let's see.
On to their number 5.
5. Sapporo
Haven't been there yet. Have heard good things. -shrug-
TFV seems to like it because it has more space. Uh. Okay.... THAT'S the attraction? TF
Says the ice sculptures are cool. Yeah ok. Why not point out all the cool things and places in/at all the other places TFV shit on before this point?
Where is the railing about drinking scams. I bet we could find one in Sapporo, of all places...
It then says "Sapporo has the best seafood". NO. Absolutely fucking not. There is incredible fucking seafood ALL OVER Japan. Different areas specialize in different seafood types. "But Sapporo has the best seafood". BULL SHIT.
"The finest Ramen". TF. Has this fucking asshat ever been to Japan. Go literally fucking anywhere in Japan. Awesome Ramen.
"Sapporo is cheaper". Yeah no shit. It's way out in the middle of nowhere almost.
"There's tons of wilderness". Uh. Sure. But people don't really travel to Japan for piles of woods and mountains, plus NEARLY EVERY OTHER FUCKING PLACE mentioned before Sapporo has tons of awesome scenery and nature. Besides Tokyo at least.
"It has skiing!" I guess TFV creator is a ski bum. Sure. Skiing is nice. -shrug-
Really weak number 5 argument imo.
4. Hiroshima
Been there. I found it boring. Will need to plan a better trip to find more good stuff there. My dislike is that people say Hiroshima is awesome and I just didn't feel that way. One of the places I'm in zero rush to return to.
I'm skipping shitting on whatever argument TFV video presents for it. I don't care.
3. Takayama
Need to check the maps to try and recall if I've been there.
Yeah I drove through there and it looked pretty and like it has lots of nice hiking and skiing. -shrug-
Next.
Well one moment. It mentioned Shirakawa-go. Yeah the houses were interesting and alright. Nothing to write home about. Seen tons of old buildings all kinda of places around Japan. -shrug-
2. Kanazawa
Need to look at the map again. One moment.
I don't think I've been there.
Unlike TFV, I try not to present myself as an authority on places I barely know anything about.
Next.
1. Fukuoka
I've been to places around Fukuoka once on a vacation. It was interesting enough.
Had no real opinions either way.
BUT, my wife lived there for a number of years, and she actively dislikes Fukuoka. I tried to understand why and couldn't really. I trust my wife over random shitty spouts bullshit YouTuber.
The end.
What about these
For a long ass YouTube video with a "Top 15 Places in Japan" weirdly saying 6-15 should be avoided ( which makes no sense ), it's most weird to me the places that weren't mentioned:
- Wakayama. Awesome scenic country area. Not Nara but closeby.
- Niigata. Seems similar to OPs top 5 imo.
- Gunma. Big chunk of scenic area right there in the middle. They dislike because no skiing??
- Fukushima
- Sado Island. OP seems to like islands and low tourists. Sado island duder.
- Chiba. Easy to get to from both international airports. Low tourists. ( besides Disney at least )
- Izu peninsula. Once again. Beautiful stuffs. Low tourists.
Summary
In closing, having reviewed nearly the whole stupid video, and ignored the conclusions and 1-5 mostly, I've come to the conclusion that the video is constructed from a few beams:
- Busy places suck
- Crowds of tourists suck, therefore avoid anything awesome and popular
- Weather exists omg
- Oceanlife is dangerous
- Tourists suck
- Skiing good
- Mountains and nothing notable around good
Pretty worthless video in my view.
Which probably makes my long painful to write and read critique of it nearly as worthless. Oh well. I was hoping for some stronger debate but I'm left with "meh this video is just overblown nonsense."
I loaded the cannon with an explosive slug and on firing it I seem to have knocked over a flimsy wooden hut.
My choice of trashy YouTube video to fight today has apparently been a poor one. Please contact me if you find something worthwhile for me engage in a good fight with. One where the opponent fights back instead of wiggles slightly.